The Doctor vs an IQ test
by Disneysara7771
Summary: The Doctor mets a IQ test. Chaos follows, of course. Only rated K  because we are paranoid. And don't know what's going to happen in future chapters. Co-written with the awesome Y.K.Willstone. 11th Doctor, Amy, Rory and River. Possibly 2-3 shot.


**So, my latest obession is Doctor Who. I was reading a fanfic by somebody else, I'm not sure who, and came up with this idea. This story is co-written with Y.. Thanks to her for some really brilliant ideas!**

**Read on! And feel free to review if you feel kind! (Please review!)**

_**DISCLAIMER: No, I don't own Doctor Who (sob). The BBC does, and I wish they would give it to me as a birthday present. But sadly, this hasn't happened yet. **_

**The Doctor vs. an IQ test**

**co-written by DisneySara7771 and Y.**

It was a normal day in the TARDIS. This morning they had stopped in Paris to have breakfast under the Eiffel Tower, the day it was opened, March 31st 1889.

Then, they bumped into some rather angry Slitheen, who as usual, were trying to take over the world.

After stopping their plan in its tracks and doing some rather impressive sonic screwdrivering, and lots of running, they found their way back to the TARDIS, for a quick lunch before deciding what to do for the rest of the day. After deciding that saving the universe once from the Slitheen was good enough for one day, and so, they decided to have the afternoon off, to just relax and hang about in the vortex.

"What ya doing Pond?" asked a rather bored looking Doctor, appearing over Amy's shoulder. He had not wanted to take break, but the Ponds' had ganged up on him and put their feet down.

"I'm doing a quiz, Doctor," answered Amy.

A few seconds later a 'ping' came from the computer, signifying the arrival of her results.

"YES!" yelled a joyous Amy, making The Doctor jump, and bang his head on the TARDIS.

"What are you so happy about?" asked the Doctor, looking puzzled at her joy.

"According to this test, my IQ is high, and I am a genius! Well, not exactly _genius,_ but pretty close."

"Let me see that," the Doctor said, pulling the computer towards him. "What exactly do you do?"

"Well," said Amy, "what you do is you the computer gives a bunch of questions, and you answer them, and then the computer tells you at the end, what your IQ is."

"That seems easy enough," said the Doctor, making himself comfortable in the chair from which he had just kicked Rory out of. "I should easily reach higher than genius level," he said smugly.

Amy and Rory looked at each other with raised eyebrows behind the Doctor's back.

"Your not vain at all, are you Doctor," said Amy.

"Hey! I have been around much longer than you. I have the entire time vortex in my brain, figuratively speaking. So of course, I'm rather smart."

The Doctor clicked 'take the test again.'

_Question 1:_

_Some months have 30 days, some have 31. How many have 28?_

"Oh, easy!" said the Doctor, scoffing at the computer. "That's really simple! 1!"

Amy and Rory smirked at each other. Their so-called 'genius' friend was obviously not so much of a genius.

_Question 2:_

_If a Doctor gives you three pills, and tells you to take 1 pill every half hour, how long before all the pills are gone?_

"Well, for a start," said the Doctor, looking slightly confused, "what type of illness do you have? And what type of Doctor would prescribe such a large amount of medicine? What a stupid man, and what a stupid question! I think that's what I'm going to answer, actually. I'm going to ask what Doctor would put his patients on a high."

The Ponds behind him burst into silent laughter.

_Question 3:_

_I went to bed at 8:00pm in the evening, and set my clock for 9:00 in the morning. How many hours of sleep will I get before the alarm wakes me up?_

"Okay, well, I'm a TimeLord. We don't need to sleep. We just don't do it, as we don't see the point! Sleeping, is boring! And for humans, and other primitive species. Besides, if they went to bed at 8, doesn't particularly mean that they went to sleep at 8. They could have read a book or something all night. Another stupid question!"

By this time, Amy and Rory were shaking with laughter. This was hilarious!

_Question 4:_

_Divide 30 by half and add ten. What do you get?_

"Finally! A decent, intelligent question!" said the Doctor.

Amy sniggered.

"Half is 0.5 and 30 times 0.5 is 60. Plus 10 is 70. 70 is the answer!"

_Question 5:_

_A farmer has 17 sheep. All but 9 died. How many sheep left?_

The Doctor snorted at the question. "Okay, so, this question expects me to go and count all the remaining sheep left in the universe. Good to know. I'm not going to bother. It would take far too long, and be way too boring, and I honestly, DON'T CARE. So, instead, I'll say, none. They all died. They all die in the end anyway. Humans find easier, better ways of getting warm clothing, from less stinky, vile creatures. God do I love the 28th century. That portentous stink is finally gone!"

_Question 6:_

_If you only had one match, and entered a cold dark room, which had a candle, oil lamp, and an oil heater, what would you light first?_

"Easy! What a stupid question again! I would use my sonic screw driver! And besides, why would you be entering a cold and dark room anyway?

_Question 7:_

_Take 2 apples from 3 apples. How many apples do you have?_

"Well, first of all, apples are vile things. They do terrible things to my taste buds. Second of all, how do you take apples from apples, it's just not possible. Stupid question. Next!"

Amy and Rory by this time were rolling in fits of laughter on the floor.

_Question 8:_

_How many animals of each species did Noah take on the ark with him?_

"His name wasn't Noah, for a start," said the Doctor, looking frustrated. "It's a common misconception. In fact, his name was Norman. Secondly, it wasn't a ark. It was a raft. A flat piece of wood. Thirdly, he took three animals of each kind. However, he took 17 dogs on board, and no cats. Rather a lot of rats and mice on the raft actually, by the end. Well, actually, by the time we found land again. Rather crowded raft by the time the water went down, but Martin was awfully nice. Didn't tip me over board and even let me keep the TARDIS on the raft, didn't ask questions about it either. Mind you, maybe he didn't see me through all those animals. "

_End of quiz. Please wait for a minute so we can assess your answers._

The Doctor looked over his shoulder at Amy and Rory, who were not even trying to suppress the laughter from escaping anymore.

He childlishly stuck his tongue out at them, and said, " your just jealous of my genius."

'Ping!' Went the computer.

_You have failed the test. The results indicate that you are an idiot, and a sheep herder is the only job you'll be good for. Don't bother trying to ever save the universe or anything above a sheep. Don't go any where near water, and we advise against driving and please step away from the computer, we fear for your safety, you might blow it up._

The Doctor stared at the screen, for a few seconds. Then yelled out: "I think we might be paying a visit to the creators of this test."

_To be continued..._

**Review? Please? We would really like your feedback!**


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